Day 6 & 7 - What three things do you need?
What makes some decisions “stick”?
I have been celebrating my birthday with two dear friends, and the kids. Both nights…great conversations, great company…and food. Both nights, we were out at chain restaurants, and I had choices to make about what to eat.
And, with daily totals for both days right at 2700 calories, while high, they aren’t out of whack at all with the idea of special days. There was desert and alcohol both evenings, contributing to the calorie counts, but still…I am very…amazed. And in conversations with my friends we kept coming back to what makes some decisions stick and some not? How come people constantly have resolutions but don’t stick with them?
Some of our answers:
Accountability. Everyone seems to respond better to other KNOWING about our goals…no one, in our group, actually wants someone taking us to task for our progress or failure. But we all want someone to know what we are trying to accomplish.
Help - Assistance: We want someone to help us reach our goals…eat new foods, take walks, save money, take a new class…we want companionship. Someone to talk about our feelings and experiences with.
Finally - Support: We want someone to cheer us on…to be a cheerleader for us. I haven’t found a single obese person who wanted to be yelled by a hard-ass. Instead…we want to know someone understands what it is like to be heavy…to battle food every day…and who has lived through the humiliation and pain of being very fat. We want compassion and empathy.
Interestingly, research shows that people who get those things are also more successful with long term massive weight loss. Accountability, Help and support are all wonderful keys to help us on our journey. And now, thanks to the internet, you can find dozens of free and low cost means of getting all three of them.
Look for them…find them and use them. They can mean the difference between long-term success or short-term frustration.
Obesity Free Challenge update:
Despite the later nights, additional calories and alcohol, my calorie counts for yesterday and today are both at 2700, and I ran yesterday morning and walked today. No weights, but that was due to scheduling. Pants are still fitting well…a testament to the relatively small bump in daily calories, and the additional movement.
The OLD me
I can easily see how in the past, appetizers, salad, entree, desert, and alcohol could add up to over 4000 calories an evening, in ADDITION to the calories I would have eaten during the day. Multiply that by 4 nights a week…52 weeks a year…and yes, 120 pounds gets added to my body pretty darn quickly.
I went through my life never telling anyone what I was doing…not asking for any help and never hoping for any compassion. Lesson learned.